The Two Kinds of Writer I Have Been..

I’ve only ever been one of two kinds of writer.

The late-night/late afternoon writer… or the office bird. I have struggled my entire life to fit my loud as heck personality into a tiny office. Every morning I would get up, mull over what I was going to wear, fighting myself to put clothing on that is appropriate.

‘Would someone’s grandma approach me wearing this?’ if the answer was ‘Nope’, I’d have to start again.

No, I cannot wear a shirt that has a dead bird on it or one that says, “Sorry, I ate your dog.” This mental conundrum wouldn’t start at 6 am most mornings; it would start the night before… “Have I washed all my decent clothing? Maybe I can get away with leggings and a baggy top?”

As I arrived at the office every morning, I would inevitably end up silent at my desk, willing my ADHD to stay quiet and let me get through the day without any hiccups. It rarely worked.

I struggled to focus from 6 am till about 2–3 pm every day. It is nothing personal my brain would tell me… We just don’t cope with people and so much inspiration all at once… The constant bombardment of people, sights, smells, and in general picking up on peoples energy is draining.

The music in each office varies. Any writer can tell you they have tunes they write to and tunes that start breaking every gear in their brains.

I cannot write to metal; I have tried and failed a million times. My mind needs hardcore drum and bass and music that makes you feel like you have snorted a can of red bull and plugged your finger into an electrical socket…

Writing in an office when you are a solitary writer that needs race-horse blinkers is hard. It is like walking through a pool of custard that is slowly freezing solid. I’d get home, and my brain would be buzzing and tired at the same time. Stimulation overload, yet in need of sleep. The nights where I worked until 10 pm or later gave me my best sleep. My best work is done between 6 pm, and 3 am…

I realised that I could not work in an office where my personality and need to silence don’t fit in. I need a space to call my second home, where sometimes the work gets done at 3 am, and that is okay because it is the best damn work you have ever seen. Sometimes I just need to sit in sweat pants or gym gear and marvel at how the world works before I can sink my teeth into a big juicy chunk of writing.

If you are considering hiring a writer, ask them whether they prefer remote work or prefer being in the office… They will thank you later.